Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
