There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
