They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
