I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
