He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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