Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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