oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
