dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
