apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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