From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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