No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
