hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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