i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize