What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Randomize
