It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
