Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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