yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
