you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
