awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize