Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
