So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize