Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
