He disabled his match.com account in front of me
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
