question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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