normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
