You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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