They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
