What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
