Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize