How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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