You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
