How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Randomize
