I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
how do flat chested girls get laid?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Found the puke drawer
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
