Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
