I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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