did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
