I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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