Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
