Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
