I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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