Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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