oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
