craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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