im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
