Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
