Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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