I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
