omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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