omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize