i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
